DRUNK DOG

Drunk dog

#animal #white #funny #drink #drinking #dog #thirsty #drunk #sitting #liquor #animals #color #feature #food #activities

New jokes

Fat momma
Your momma is so fat when she got on the scale it said, "I need your weight not your phone number."

Cheap hotels
Q: What do cheap hotels and designer jeans have in common? A: No ballroom.

Snowman snowwoman
What is the difference between a snowman and a snowwoman? Snowballs.

A BLONDE & HER THERMOS
A blonde notices that her coworker has a thermos, so she asks him what it's for. He responds, "It keeps hot things hot and cold things cold." The blonde immediately buys one for herself. The next day, she goes to work and proudly displays it. Her coworker asks, "What do you have in it?" She replies, "Soup and ice cream."

Man vs priest
Man to his priest: “Yesterday I sinned with an 18 year old girl.” The priest: “Squeeze 18 lemons and drink the juice all at once.” Man: “And that frees me from my sin?” Priest: “No, but it frees your face from that dirty grin.

Envelope
Q: What starts with E, ends with E, and has only 1 letter in it? A: Envelope.

Harry Potter
Q: How does Albus get into Hogwarts? A: Through the Dumble-door.

Christmas
How is Christmas like your job? You do all the work and the fat guy in the suit gets all the credit.