DRUNK DOG

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Drunk dog

#animal #white #funny #drink #drinking #dog #thirsty #drunk #sitting #liquor #animals #color #feature #food #activities

New jokes

Tiger Woods vs Santa
Q: What is the difference between Tiger Woods and Santa Claus? A: Santa stops after three hos.

Tears in eyes
My friend told me he gets tears in his eyes whenever his partner makes tender love to him. At first I thought he was an overemotional sissy, then I remembered: He's still in prison

Kids conversation
Kid 1: "Hey, I bet you're still a virgin." Kid 2: "Yeah, I was a virgin until last night ." Kid 1: "As if." Kid 2: "Yeah, just ask your sister." Kid 1: "I don't have a sister." Kid 2: "You will in about nine months."

50 cent
Yo momma's so stupid, she put two quarters in her ears and thought she was listening to 50 Cent.

Beans
A teacher asked her students to use the word "beans" in a sentence. "My father grows beans," said one girl. "My mother cooks beans," said a boy. A third student spoke up, "We are all human beans."

Value of pi
Teacher: What is the value of Pi? Student: Depending on what pie. Usually is $12.99

Pregnant woman
A 3 years old boy sits near a pregnant woman. Boy: Why do you look so fat? Pregnant woman: I have a baby inside me. Boy: Is it a good baby? Pregnant woman: Yes, it is a very good baby. Boy: Then why did you eat it?!

Hamburgers
Q: Why do hamburgers go to the gym A: To get better buns!