Sad reality of nature
Q: What does a skeleton order at a restaurant? A: Spare ribs!
What is a Mexican's favorite sport? Cross-country.
Q: Why did the witches' team lose the baseball game? A: Their bats flew away.
If athletes get athletes foot, what do astronauts get? Missletoe!
I just read a book about Helium. It was so good that I can't put it down.
What is the difference between a snowman and a snowwoman? Snowballs.
Teacher and students
Teacher: "Kids, what does the chicken give you?" Student: "Meat!" Teacher: "Very good! Now what does the pig give you?" Student: "Bacon!" Teacher: "Great! And what does the fat cow give you?" Student: "Homework!"
Yo momma is so stupid when an intruder broke into her house, she ran downstairs, dialed 9-1-1 on the microwave, and couldn't find the "CALL" button.