HOMER SIMPSON

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Homer simpson

#shocked #woman #fail #simpsons #yellow #omg #wtf #confused #emotion #people #others #celebrities #color #reactions

New jokes

Teacher and students
Teacher: "Kids, what does the chicken give you?" Student: "Meat!" Teacher: "Very good! Now what does the pig give you?" Student: "Bacon!" Teacher: "Great! And what does the fat cow give you?" Student: "Homework!"

Tiger Woods vs Santa
Q: What is the difference between Tiger Woods and Santa Claus? A: Santa stops after three hos.

Santas sack
Q: Why is Santa Claus' sack so big? A: He only comes once a year.

Skeleton
Q: Why did the skeleton cross the road? A: To get to the body shop.

Adele
Q: Why did Adele cross the road? A: To sing, "Hello from the other side!"

Reporter vs man
Reporter: "Excuse me, may I interview you?" Man: "Yes!" Reporter: "Name?" Man: "Abdul Al-Rhazim." Reporter: "Sex?" Man: "Three to five times a week." Reporter: "No no! I mean male or female?" Man: "Yes, male, female... sometimes camel." Reporter: "Holy cow!" Man: "Yes, cow, sheep... animals in general." Reporter: "But isn't that hostile?" Man: "Yes, horse style, dog style, any style." Reporter: "Oh dear!" Man: "No, no deer. Deer run too fast. Hard to catch."

Pee in the shower
Q: Who cares if you pee in the shower? A: The bride and all her guests, apparently.

Fat momma
Your momma is so fat when she got on the scale it said, "I need your weight not your phone number."