SCARY HOUSE

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Scary house

#weird #funny #strange #fail #scary #house #feature #others #place

New jokes

Naughty girls
Why is Santa Claus so jolly? Because he knows where all the naughty girls live.

Fat momma
Your momma is so fat when she got on the scale it said, "I need your weight not your phone number."

Trick-or-treating
A little kid was out trick-or-treating on Halloween dressed as a pirate. He rang a house's doorbell and the door was opened by a lady. "Oh, how cute! A little pirate! And where are your buccaneers?" she asked. The boy replied, "Under my buckin' hat."

Snowman snowwoman
What is the difference between a snowman and a snowwoman? Snowballs.

Elves in school
Q: What do elves learn in school? Q: What do elves learn in school? A: The Elfabet.

Christmas
How is Christmas like your job? You do all the work and the fat guy in the suit gets all the credit.

Get married
On their way to get married, a young Catholic couple is involved in a fatal car accident. The couple found themselves sitting outside the Pearly Gates waiting for St. Peter to process them into Heaven. While waiting, they began to wonder: Could they possibly get married in Heaven? When St. Peter showed up, they asked him. St. Peter said, "I don't know. This is the first time anyone has asked. Let me go find out,'" and he left. The couple sat and waited, and waited. Two months passed and the couple were still waiting. While waiting, they began to wonder what would happen if it didn't work out; could you get a divorce in heaven? After yet another month, St. Peter finally returned, looking somewhat bedraggled. "Yes," he informed the couple, "You can get married in Heaven." "Great!" said the couple, "But we were just wondering, what if things don't work out? Could we also get a divorce in Heaven?" St. Peter, red-faced with anger, slammed his clipboard onto the ground. "What's wrong?" asked the frightened couple. "OH, COME ON!," St. Peter shouted, "It took me three months to find a priest up here! Do you have any idea how long it'll take me to find a lawyer?"

Months
Q: Can February march? A: No, but April may.